H1N1 is screwing up a lot of things. It's irritating me. It's ruining the orientation wk that i could possibly go for and i don't know. I'm still v v v confused about this orientation thing, i can't freaking decide if i want to go or not, because it would mean a lot of uncomfortable situations! :( Upsetupsetupset. Anyway,

Crewing with bevo was good today, i enjoyed myself and missed school like crazy. It hit me today that there's nth much that can beat the ac spirit already because in nus all the ppl will be split up into different faculties so on and so forth. The ac spirit was good as it got! And now it won't be with me everyday anymore because i'm not in ac. And the foooooood. Where else on earth would you get meals below $4 at max?

Anyway. Tomorrow i have to decide if i want to go for orientation or not. Even though i'll miss the first two days. Okay i think i might. Even though the meter was nearing an 80:20 last night after talking to charisse, and even ms sang told me not to go but.... I don't know maybe it's worth a shot. :( I CANT MAKE UP MY MIND.

Aus trip in like, a week plus' time, i haven't thought of what i want to bring yet! And i spent a bomb on a presnt, and my birthday's going to suck because anyone worth spending the time with isn't free on the day itself, and .. I don't know i'm just not excited anymore. I'm genuinely Not excited =.=

And i'm irritated with h1n1, screwing up my plans like crazy. I was in a good mood today after the whole EXERT YOURSELF AND SWEAT AND EAT LESS thing then i looked at the stupid weighing scale and nothing much has changed. I hate my weight and the way i look and it's nobody's fault but mine because i love coke, and good yummy carbs, which is probably the major reason why. Bev told me today that she's taking up some intensive self defense class i think i shall do that for a sport. And maybe JUST MAYBE i'll join something sporty in uni, time to change myself back to my crazy lose weight self i can't keep being so discontented with the way i look for my entire life.

Say goodbye to coke (which is why ac's good too since there's no coke thre at all, to buy) and pasta and noodles and omg :( upset. It's just a rant and coach carter is taking forever to upload so maybe i'll just go back to one tree hill and have an early night in; i made my dad pick me up from ac after crew finished just now because i was super tired and didn't want an hour long bus ride home and i think i temporarily died in the car. So. Early night i guess! Church tmr, and sara's party, what a daaaay! And maybe i'll ask carol about the going down to sign up for oweek thing, i figure if i just force myself and sign up when i get back from Cairns i'll probably take a week to get used to it and go in the end. or i could just now go. ZOMG confusing.